One Last Cry - Brian McKnight

[Javastorm]

Did the original version recently. Any and all feedback welcome.

https://app.box.com/s/z4pem1kzthgsv7y2iandr7oliyqt5qnw

 

[Gsoul82]

Hey Java, nice to see you in here again. I'm dropping into let you know I already listened to the whole thing and wrote up a few comments, based on timestamps. 90% of what I'm going to say has been written already.

You should be expecting to see me to post that feedback between now and sometime tonight.

[Gsoul82]

All in all, this is a pretty solid attempt. In my opinion, few things could've been done better. Nice riffs throughout. I could feel the emotion.

Here's what I found noteworthy.

1:09 The shift into falsetto in the phrase "All my feeling was gone". I think you can make this smoother. Matter of fact, I know you can.

1:50 Very nice melisma!

2:24 Sing "gone" stronger. Sounds like you may have been having a little support dilemma there.

3:10 to 3:19 Your falsetto was getting quiet again, like we talked about before. Just noting it here, in case you didn't catch it.

3:44 The break here, while singing, "Dry my eyes," was a nice touch for the tone of the song. You're good at the use of little accents like that. Kind of like how I complimented you on the hint of rasp you used in your Christina Aguilera cover, a few weeks back. Keep this in mind, going forward.

3:47-3:48 The shift into falsetto here, at, "I had my," sounds just a little flat.

4:20 Nice transition into falsetto and nice ending. Was a little quiet here as well, but it's not as problematic. The difference between it there, and where I mentioned it at the 3:10 to 3:19 area is you don't want that happening in the middle of those smooth runs. People will miss them.

 

[Javastorm]

Thanks for taking the time to mark all these points with timestamps, it really helps! I agree with everything you said about each problem spot. This was recorded a little before the Christmas cover, so I wasn't really working on lower falsetto notes, but I definitely am aware of it now and am trying to build more resonance with them. I agree that if they are too quiet and I'm trying to do a run or something it is not worth it if people can't hear the run properly defined. I kept going back to the lines after the instrumental break and yep, "had" and "my" are pitchy. I'm grateful for the constructive feedback @Gsoul82, thanks again for listening.

[Gsoul82]

2 minutes ago, Javastorm said:

Thanks for taking the time to mark all these points with timestamps, it really helps! I agree with everything you said about each problem spot. This was recorded a little before the Christmas cover, so I wasn't really working on lower falsetto notes, but I definitely am aware of it now and am trying to build more resonance with them. I agree that if they are too quiet and I'm trying to do a run or something it is not worth it if people can't hear the run properly defined. I kept going back to the lines after the instrumental break and yep, "had" and "my" are pitchy. I'm grateful for the constructive feedback @Gsoul82, thanks again for listening.

You're very welcome. If you don't see me respond to one of your covers, it means I missed it, so feel free to PM and and ask me to check it out.

You're doing great though. Keep on pushing forward.

[ronws]

I have nothing to add but that was an awesome review. Granted you are good singer, Java, but kudos to G for giving the kind of help you are actually looking for.