MrBolodenka

No problem, that's helpful info.

Particularly the parts about getting better at other things besides singing despite the same lack of confidence. Is there any chance those other things didn't really directly involve the body too much? You see, the difference with singing is, you are your own instrument. You're not working with other objects, it's all inside of you and all controlled by your brain. I believe singing is a little more directly affected by the brain than other skills that involve separate equipment that is part of what helps you do the task. I don't know for sure, that's just my theory.

That being said, not getting access to the right techniques also has something to do with it. There is a lot of bogus out there in the word of vocal pedagogy.

Going back to the mental stuff. First off, sorry if I pressured you into revealing more than you wanted to. I'm going to assume for now that you've tried everything you can and your condition just can't be fully treated at this point in time. Though I would recommend being perfectly honest with your therapist or psychiatrist about hitting the brick wall, and possible seeing a different therapist or psychiatrist, if you haven't already done that.

If it can't be fully treated, well, you can do your best trying to learn the techniques despite the mental handicap. It should probably still work to some extent as long as you can get your hands on the right resources that will really teach you how to sing well. You probably will never be amazing because of the mental condition, but you should be able to get up to close to the skill level of other things you can do despite your mental condition.

If all else fails, don't worry about it, just sing okay and leave it as a therapeutic hobby. I think I have read/heard somewhere that singing can be therapeutic for the mind, and have personally felt that it can create a bit of a natural high sometimes. You don't need to hold onto expectations of having to perform or record something good. I wouldn't recommend not singing at all just because you think you are not good at it. If you like the concept of singing, do it. Heck, maybe if you just stop worrying about it, you might end up getting better at it.

Have fun with it, do whatever makes singing the most enjoyable for you. Whether it's no longer caring how you sound and singing your heart out in the shower, or investing thousands of dollars in quality vocal training and going on to become a professional singer, or anywhere in between...do what your heart desires.

I wish you the best of luck. Keep your hopes up.

Thanks for your understanding. The only reason I sing is because I love to sing; it does make me feel better. The main thing that's holding me back is the fact that I sound much different in my head when I speak and sing than I do to other people. When I speak, I don't hear myself mumbling (other people hear me mumbling), I don't hear a muffled voice (which is what other people hear). My voice is clean, crisp, clear, and to myself, I sound...well, very good.

And that's what makes this so frustrating...I sound good, but only in my own head. My voice isn't terrible to others, but it isn't as good as what I hear, and that's what I'm looking to achieve. I don't know exactly why this is, and it's very strange and intriguing. From what I understand, it is related to the shape and size of the sinus cavities. I have a deviated septum, and I'm going to take a wild guess and assume that it isn't helping anything. If that's the case and I can't change it...well I'm not sure I'll sing around anyone.

Ah, a classic case of "singing is mental"

That kind of mentality, the insecurity and lack of trust in yourself, WILL make it impossible to sing well if you don't do anything about it. (1) I would recommend seeking therapy or treatment. If this is really as bad as you make it sound.

(2) Maybe it could just be a matter of understanding that calling yourself insecure and not trusting others is basically your own choice you have made. Based on a false assumption that you cannot change your mentality to be secure and trust others. Well, the reality is, you can, if you believe you can change.

Try that first...(3) start believing that you can get better at anything if you practice it. The cool thing about that belief is it's factually true, so you have no reason not to believe it.

What you are doing now is practicing without believing it will improve your singing. That's not much different from not practicing. And that's why you haven't been improving. You need a positive, hopeful attitude while practicing in order to get better.

(4) You need to believe that you can improve at singing first (and you can...anyone can). Only then will you actually progress in your singing.

Get your mentality together first, that's my advice. However you go about doing that. Maybe you just need to make a conscious change of attitude, or maybe you are really stuck in a rut need some kind of other form of help. But singing is as mental as it is physical. (5) Your mentality must be working right in order for the physical components to start working right.

1) Been in therapy for years. I'll explain that in a few more bulletin points.

2) One of the things I've been in therapy for is insecurity and severe trust issues. I choose not to trust people because of what happened many years ago. If I can't even trust my own family, I can't afford to trust my friends. Allowing people to get close to me is not worth the risk of getting burned again. I don't even trust my therapist, who I have been seeing for a little over 6 years.

3) That's something that I've known works but it doesn't seem to help my singing. I do this with everything that I want to get better at, whether it be science work, gaming, or anything in between. If I want to be better, I do what it takes to get better. But that isn't working for my singing, and I have the same mental state/lack of confidence regarding my singing as other areas in which I have vastly improved.

4) As stated in point 3, I do believe that I can get better with practice, but I haven't been trained or properly educated. And the confidence thing is an issue which I will explain in the next and final point.

5) My mentality hasn't been in working order for 12 years. As a result of events that occurred in middle school, for some reason I left the school with more emotional and mental trauma than I thought was possible for that situation. The end result was the development of a very serious mental disorder which I won't say publicly; but to explain it mildly, it has left me extremely paranoid, anxious, defensive, insecure, and self conscious. Because of the emotional and mentally scarring events, it has also left me very cynical and bitter.

I'm taking meds of course, and I'm in therapy. But, again, I've hit a brick wall. No matter how much I want to change, and no matter how much I make a conscious effort to change, it doesn't happen. I've been at this for years, and there has only been improvement in my mood; and because of the meds, I don't have serious problems (I mean end up in jail or dead within a month serious) that would occur if I was off the meds.

*EDIT*

Too long, didn't read:

1) Mental disorder causing mental and psychological instability

2) I haven't heard another singer with a voice similar to mine, which I like, because I don't want people to think that I sound like someone else; I want my voice to be unique...but I don't like the sound of my voice.

3) I don't like the way my voice sounds because I mumble...very badly. My annunciation is appalling, and I'm going to need a lot of help to correct it (I can't count the number of times people have told me that I could be a ventriloquist).

Summary of what to do:

1) Get past the mental block

2) Speech Therapist

3) Vocal Coach

4) Sing my heart out

1) I've been insecure since I was 11 (I'm 23 now) and as you said, I don't think it's helping...

2) As for trusting my voice, I hate my regular speaking voice and I have a hard time believing that my singing voice will be able to deliver in terms of overall performance. That...and I have severe trust issues, though I don't know how much that plays into it (don't trust my own judgement of other peoples character).

Hi there. I'm not exactly new to the forums, but if you were here about...a couple of years ago, you may recognize my voice. And...it really hasn't improved since then, despite practicing on and off. Two samples below, both in .Ogg format.

Two samples. First is an abridged version of "Awake" by Josh Groban.

Awake (It's terrible)

Second is "That's Life" by Frank Sinatra. I sang it in the same Key as in this video: That's Life

Here is me singing:

That's Life (even worse)

I have been trying to access my head voice for years, though I often get frustrated after a period of 6 months and give up, then come back after a few months. I don't sing professionally, but I enjoy singing and would like to sound decent, if not the best that I can. I don't like the tone of my voice, I have a poor range, and to top it all off, my annunciation is atrocious.

I've done searches of all kinds looking for information, and I've run out of new pages and new info. I've tried lip rolls to help - nothing. I've tried humming in the same tone that I talk in - nada. I've tried relaxing my throat and keeping my larynx still and I still can't do either of these. I'm out of ideas, and I can't get a personal trainer.

Help?