Original Song that is a work in progress

[Baritone]

I just started to write this song so this is me just running tru it, please note that the lyrics and melody are a work in progress and I do of course intend to finish it. I just want some tips on the singing.

Thanks for your reviews/critiques. All tips and insight are appreciated, good or bad. Thanks again!

https://app.box.com/s/gydcy152gr9v8u8v6gxw

Lyrics: Song - More to Me

Most people think

There’s not much more to me

Than what you see

And that’s how I want it to be

Honestly

When we first met

You thought I was like

Everybody

No more to see

That way you don’t look to deep

That’s how I know you never knew me

Before you forget me

I want you to know

There’s more to me

Before you forget me

I want you to know

I need you to know!

There’s more to me

More to me

More to me

Than what you've seen

[gilad]

Hey Baritone,

Ok, the idea is not bad at all. It can become a pretty nice production. Has the Michael Jackson touch if you know what I mean.

Please bare in mind, these are my personal opinions:

1) When we first me, You thought I was like, (Everybody).. Everybody doesn't sound well in the melody, at least not the way its sung. Try singing it not Every...Body but Everybody. I think it will fit better.

2) To me it sounds like 1 verse, and 1 chorus. Am i right?

All in all, i love it, and think it has huge potential with a full production.

Good luck, and feel free to reach out to me via email if you want help with the production.

[Baritone]

Hey Baritone,

Ok, the idea is not bad at all. It can become a pretty nice production. Has the Michael Jackson touch if you know what I mean.

Please bare in mind, these are my personal opinions:

1) When we first me, You thought I was like, (Everybody).. Everybody doesn't sound well in the melody, at least not the way its sung. Try singing it not Every...Body but Everybody. I think it will fit better.

2) To me it sounds like 1 verse, and 1 chorus. Am i right?

All in all, i love it, and think it has huge potential with a full production.

Good luck, and feel free to reach out to me via email if you want help with the production.

Thanks for listening! I'm glad you like it, I think it can be great too. I will try that with the Lyrics, I do agree some parts can be written better so I will have to sing it and try different things. (2) Yes, this is just a verse and chorus. Thanks again.

[ronws]

I agree with Gilad. It's got that MJ sound and feel. Finish it. Full arrangement and everything.

[Baritone]

I agree with Gilad. It's got that MJ sound and feel. Finish it. Full arrangement and everything.

Thanks will do. Any notes on the singing? I'm thinking of singing it in a little more of a natural voice at the beginning of phrases (not so much light mass phonation the whole time) so when I go to the higher notes it will sound more dynamic.

[Duchi]

At 0:40, 0:53 and 1:25 it sounds out of tune, like you dont know where exactly you want to end that melody, sometimes it happens to me also, when the melody goes down the scale, you have to think of the note you want to end it at.

[Baritone]

At 0:40, 0:53 and 1:25 it sounds out of tune, like you dont know where exactly you want to end that melody, sometimes it happens to me also, when the melody goes down the scale, you have to think of the note you want to end it at.

Thanks man! I have a problem with hitting low notes when they end a phrase. It's as if I think all the endings "should end on a high note." haha But seriously, even my vocal coach tells me that it's a all about knowing the note and being mindful of it because after all it should be easier to hit the lower note. This is something I'm glad you brought to my attention thanks.

Can anyone suggests any exercises that help with this?

[gilad]

Listen to the music, Think what note needs to be vocalized, then Vocalize :cool:

[Duchi]

Or try figuring out the vocal melody on a piano\guitar, that way you can be sure which note you want to sing.

[ronws]

Actually, that brings an interesting question to mind. As I have learned, a voice type is not just range but weight. For example, your log-in is baritone. But you don't really get a "baritone" sound in this. And normally, I would think a baritone would have no problems with low notes.

I was wrong, it seems. That's okay, I learn something new every day. Which makes Gilad's and your teacher's words even more valid. visualize or pre-conceive the note. Then do it.

And, to do that, you have to get away from the range description. For example, I am not a baritone. But I have done some notes really low. I did it by not worrying about range descriptions. I did it because I "felt" the note.

[Baritone]

Or try figuring out the vocal melody on a piano\guitar, that way you can be sure which note you want to sing.

I'm going to do this, breaking it down like this will help me figure out the right notes for sure thanks.

[Baritone]

you're right, what it really is in my case is that because I'm trying to sing this in my higher register when I come across a low note (especially when it's ending a line) I don't go low enough. Almost as if I'm trying to hard to stay a float, if that makes sense.

When I first started with my vocal coach I was surprised how much of my problem was the low notes, As dumb as it sounds I was singing as if the line always ends higher than it begins. This is something I am working on, I appreciate the insight. Sometimes I don’t hear it but that’s a ear training issue.

[ronws]

I get the floating thing. Nothing wrong with that. I just don't hear a lot of what I think as "baritone" in this. Which may have to do with my perception.

[HoboJimMcFarbin]

I like it. I heard a few minor off pitch/muffled vocal sounds. Vocals could use a little more umph IMO. But good idea, lots of potential.