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Homeward Bound

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JellyJack
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I actually liked that. :)

I can only give an opinion. If they(whoever they are :P) cannot tell you what they think is missing or is out of place or what direction they want to go we can only speculate.

The song seems a little listless, lacking energy, dreamy. Which is not bad for this song. As I said, I like it this way. But you can change the inflection of words to change the feel... The only way to describe this concept is by YOU saying the words yourself giving the same phrases differet meanings. This can also harm an otherwise good interpretation. So caution is advised.

"Everyday's an endless stream of cigarettes and magazines" You may say this out of shear boredom. You may say this out of frustration. You may say this while also thinking about how good it will feel when you get home. Or maybe out of the promice that this phase of the journey is ending and being in a rush for it to be over.

In my own opinion a song is a story and you are the narrator. You give the story its meaning by the way say the lines.

In my rendition I tried to give it an air of urgency to get home and disdain for putting myself in that situation. I do not know if that meaning came through or not but that is what I was feeling while singing the song. Others may go for the Homesick aspect of the song.

Your pitch and tone sounded fine to me. The verses and chorus sounded as if they were a different tempo. Even though the chorus and verse sounds as if one is faster than the other the underlying beat should be the same speed.

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You have a lovely tone! I didn't hear any pitch or tone issues personally, and I love the way you did this song. I didn't hear anything wrong vocally, but mix-wise for me your vocals were a bit low and hard to hear against the music: that may be my headphones though.

Perhaps dynamically sing the choruses a bit more powerful if you wanted to change it up a bit, but I honestly don't think that's necessary for this type of song: I liked it a lot as is.

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