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Alice in Chains - Man in the Box

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Timotheus
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Tim, nice work on this song... good job posting it here... lets see what the community has to say. I think its a good effort considering you have been training with me for about 6 months or so... 

 

Glad your enjoying the forum as well.

 

This post is for your benefit... so folks, give feedback for Tim if you can.  

 

However, I did do a quick, impromptu iPhone version of this about a year or so ago, actually in response to another discussion on this forum... a may as well share the fox hole with my student... here is my quick, low production version of this.

 

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My opinion on the song:

 

- I think you sound flat. It might be the mix, but it sounds as if you're just a tad below what you're supposed to be singing. It might be that you're dampening the larynx too much?

- Don't go overboard with the effects, Layne didn't.

- You start out really heavy, "AHM The man in the box" instead of the really droll, creaky, almost nasal falsettoish tone Layne started with, and if you're going to do that you'd better nail the pitch on the first try, since it leaves no room for subtle correction.

 

+ Your tone is f*ing awesome dude, you've got a great voice

+ The chorus sounds great, very powerful even without the compression. Can't wait 'til you get some compression going.

 

You sound a bit scandinavian. :)

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I can both agree and disagree with Khassera. I do agree that you start out too heavy on the verses. Layne went easy, almost conversational and saved full tilt boogie for the choruses.

 

I disagree on the anchoring. I think you are anchoring just fine. Where have a mis-step is going from high to low. By going full blast all the time, you are basically in high gear and down-shifting with too many revs, to continue the car metaphor.

 

You are getting the high notes just fine, big and heroic.When the melody descends, you are over-swinging, to borrow from baseball. 

 

To mix metaphors and go back to cars, look at a descending note as a turn in the race course. Take your foot off the gas and let gear compression bring you back in. You have the right deep sound and actually sound a bit like Layne on this.

 

What's going right? You have the right vowels, you have the right voice type, you have good articulation and I could understand everything you were singing. Timing was excellent and your go-for-broke commitment was spot-on. You own this song, as if you wrote it.

 

I don't know if you are taking lessons with Robert, who does an outstanding cover of this for a one-off, or if your work is with the home study kit but if I, a non-expert, can help, I would suggest running through this a few times at half of your singing volume and get the pitches correct. Then, release back into it.

 

Or change the mix in your cans. I have the feeling, more than anything, that at a few places, you could not hear yourself or the music and were flying blind.

 

General summation, I really liked it and think you just need to fix a few pitches.

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To add to Ron's post:

 

I don't know how Rob has you practice, but I suggest going through the song in very, very small phrases, recording them, playing them back until they're perfect. Don't move on until you feel you nailed everything, since this song, if any, is a good example of going from "I'm too young to die" to "Nightmare."

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Thanks Khassera and Ron for both of your feedback, I will put your suggestions into practice.  Relistening to the track I can definitely see what you both mean. I've been training with Rob since August and when we practiced the song, we do break it down verse by verse.  I'll definitely be more consistent with that.

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Yes, good feedback guys.. thanks for helping Tim out... I guess from your teacher's perspective, I have the added benefit of seeing how far you have come and Im a bit "protective" I guess... it needs work, yes... but compared to a lot of people that try this bro... its a noble effort. I particularly think the chorus on that high Bb is impressive for your current level of training... on the verses, these guys are talking more about prosody, interpretation, sound colors, character voicing... your doing great... keep going... your on the right path.

 

... and these guys don't sugar coat anything either... 

 

:unsure:

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