Jarom

Yea there is actually. If I have it close up it distorts and is actually even harder to hear. So, yea that's the reason. I'm going into the studio to get some high quality recordings in April. These were just quick recordings on a broken phone while I was playing around with some ideas.

Messing around with a few song ideas. These are not polished at all yet and are in the early stages of song writing.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0jF0P95iUbn
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aDuD6nAyuB
 
 

... your demos have tempo problems Jarom... start with locking down the tempo and groove better... its rushing and slowing down and rushing... music like that... needs to "drone" dude... be very steady.

Good for you Jarom.
Hats off to anyone that writes their own tunes.
I really love the modality of these songs... they are a bit minor aren't they. I have heard your songs before and you have a flare for the "sad" and "spooky" I think. Your songs remind me a bit of "The Cure"... which is hauntingly beautiful music.
Your voice is also lovely, it has great potential... 
However,...
You can improve Jarom by cleaning up the basic musicianship. This music has SO MUCH potential for dynamics and sensitivity, but I think your missing the cues bud. You are missing what your own song is asking you to do for it... its a little bit rushed, a little bit one level in dynamics... it sounds to me like your just not sensitizing yourself enough to what your own songs could be doing. You're being careless. Your like Lenny from Steinbeck's "Of Mice & Men"... petting a mouse too hard, but with the best intentions. 
You should get in front of me for 1 or 2 hours on skype and let me coach you on these two songs.
Also... you need to find a better way to produce recordings. Even if it is just a raw idea... you can do better then this. Get a small recording device and record "in-line" to a PA system that has both your keyboard and your vocals in it... not some recorder that is sitting on the other side of the room.
 

Messing around with a few song ideas. These are not polished at all yet and are in the early stages of song writing.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0jF0P95iUbn
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aDuD6nAyuB
 
 

Yea there is actually. If I have it close up it distorts and is actually even harder to hear. So, yea that's the reason. I'm going into the studio to get some high quality recordings in April. These were just quick recordings on a broken phone while I was playing around with some ideas.

Messing around with a few song ideas. These are not polished at all yet and are in the early stages of song writing.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0jF0P95iUbn
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aDuD6nAyuB
 
 

I like both ideas. I have a home recording setup but when I am in "Idea Collection" mode I tend to just turn on a mic or a guitar etc and lay down the ideas quick and dirty lol. I will often do this until I have maybe a half hour or more of song ideas. I wrote a song the other day when I went back to the beginning of a 45 min doodle location and had forgot all about the ideas I put down at the beginning of the song location! I refined it etc. but I think trying to capture the vibe is the most important thing when trying to archive an ideas to develop later.
 

Messing around with a few song ideas. These are not polished at all yet and are in the early stages of song writing.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0jF0P95iUbn
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aDuD6nAyuB
 
 

Right off the bat, I like the first song more. If you are just asking for personal preferences, that's it. Though I would like to hear your voice better. Is there some religious reason for having the recorder so far away? It doesn't make sense from a recording standpoint and I don't want to step on religion but I was wondering if it was possible to get the mic a little closer.
 

Messing around with a few song ideas. These are not polished at all yet and are in the early stages of song writing.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0jF0P95iUbn
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0aDuD6nAyuB
 
 

Yea, it was getting kind of awkward ..... Jeremy saved the day. Let us all pray to the dear King Jeremy.
BTW. Kevin Richards is a good coach and a good singer, and yea he has many embarrassing moments online, but so does Robert, Ken, Brett, and everyone else.

They don't call me "membership support" for nothing.   

Yea, it was getting kind of awkward ..... Jeremy saved the day. Let us all pray to the dear King Jeremy.
BTW. Kevin Richards is a good coach and a good singer, and yea he has many embarrassing moments online, but so does Robert, Ken, Brett, and everyone else.

Yea, it was getting kind of awkward ..... Jeremy saved the day. Let us all pray to the dear King Jeremy.
BTW. Kevin Richards is a good coach and a good singer, and yea he has many embarrassing moments online, but so does Robert, Ken, Brett, and everyone else.

Yea, it was getting kind of awkward ..... Jeremy saved the day. Let us all pray to the dear King Jeremy.
BTW. Kevin Richards is a good coach and a good singer, and yea he has many embarrassing moments online, but so does Robert, Ken, Brett, and everyone else.

Points to Jeremy for trying to lighten the mood

build it up slowly but surely. Keep your throat relaxed and try to add power by using resonance instead of shouting. Doing the boring annoying vocal work outs and warm ups are what will do you the best good. All the nay nay nays mum mum-mums, and sirens  you get so sick of doing are what grows the voice.
In your clip, you are way breathy and don't have any compression. This is one of the reasons it sounds so weak. Try a quack and release onset or crying like a baby but keep the heady placement you have if that makes sense..

build it up slowly but surely. Keep your throat relaxed and try to add power by using resonance instead of shouting. Doing the boring annoying vocal work outs and warm ups are what will do you the best good. All the nay nay nays mum mum-mums, and sirens  you get so sick of doing are what grows the voice.
In your clip, you are way breathy and don't have any compression. This is one of the reasons it sounds so weak. Try a quack and release onset or crying like a baby but keep the heady placement you have if that makes sense..

A quick attempt at the scream from dream on. I have always had trouble with this but within the last week or 2 it has become very easy!!
 

Pretty good stab at it and it sounds close to the original, actually. 

Don't worry about sounding to soft or wimpy right now. Just worry about bridging and connecting  through the break without choking. By the way you don't sound quiet or wimpy in this recording.  One thing you can try is singing the top note in falsetto over and over again while slowly adding some twang by crying like a baby or quacking like a duck. High notes should almost feel like falsetto but sound like chest if you do them right.

This sounds really good. 

I thought it was awesome so I posted it here to brag. Anyways.... is there anything you guys recommend me doing to make it better? 
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0fyCH3oqtVe