Rosa

Hey guys, so last time I posted rock songs and this time I am going to show you more of a romantic side and see what you think. I know I need a good microphone and I am saving up for one currently. Looking forward to your critiques!
 
http://www.smule.com/recording/coldplay-green-eyes/350287919_289191568
 
http://www.smule.com/recording/etta-james-at-last/350287919_231097263

Hi guys! I just signed up for the premium membership and I am so excited to get advice and critiques from you all. I am very serious about my singing and I would like complete honesty when it comes to critiquing my voice. It has has always been my dream to be a recording artist and I really want to go on The Voice or a similar show. Over the past year or so, I have really been trying to develop a unique tone to my voice and I would like to know if it working for me or not and what can I do to improve? I can sing several styles and do different things to my voice for different effects. For the purpose of this post, I have a certain singing style that I would like critiqued, which is my "rock voice." Please be brutally honest and I would like a critique on both videos below. Thank you!

http://www.smule.com/recording/nirvana-smells-like-teen-spirit/350287919_289787967
 
http://www.smule.com/recording/guns-n-roses-sweet-child-o-mine/350287919_289762473



 

Somehow I couldn't get this song out of my head, so I just had to do a recording of it 
 
https://app.box.com/s/09w5zru9hcakz34m250ya21iwidv0xhc

You have not heard a BeeGees Song? Except for the fact that they were railroaded because of the Disco fiasco they were brilliant song writers and singers. After the death of Disco and the BeeGees boycot they had Number one hits as writers and producers in pretty much all genres except for Classical. They had hits in Country, RnB, Pop and Rock. The only writers and producers to have #1 albums in Country, RnB, Pop and Rock at the same time. Although different singers singing the songs it was BeeGees we were listening to.
    "Islands in the Streem" performed by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rodgers was a BeeGees Song.  I am not sure what the other songs were at this point but that was the beauty of it. We were still listening to BeeGees even after the Beegees themselves were blackballed from the Radio stations because of the Disco thing.
   Just click on youtube and treat yourself to some BeeGees. You will not be disappointed.
   I already posted one BeeGees Song a little while back but I have one or two in mind for this challenge.

Soooo cute, Javastorm!  

I tried to avoid the languages I have some familiarity with for the sake of the challenge (French/Spanish/Italian/Korean). I loved the Disney OST's growing up and i frequently listen to the foreign dubs of songs that stand out in my memory or look for new ones a lot - The Norwegian singer's voice (Tor Endresen) for the Tarzan soundtrack blew me away when I first heard him. I did "Two Worlds, One Family" (To liv, Til hørlighet - literally "two lives, belonging") for the challenge in Norwegian. If there are any scandinavian/Norwegian users here it would be great to know if my pronunciation doesn't suck =D
https://app.box.com/s/q1z3hldhv1loq8agbyqx90fpatbk5tms
These are the lyrics if anyone is interested:
Skjebnen vandrer sine egne veier
To liv, tilhørighet
Velg din vei, i kjærlighet
Som bare hjertet vet
 
The fate wanders (in) its own ways
Two lives, belonging
Choose your way, in love
That only your heart knows about
 
Et paradis på ukjent sted
En verden uten fortred
Et enkelt liv, et liv i fred
 
A paradise on an unknown place
A world without any damage
A simple life, a peaceful life
 
Løvet hvisker under nakne føtter
To liv, tilhørighet
Velg din vei, i kjærlighet
Som bare hjertet vet
 
Leaves whisper under naked feet
Two lives, belonging
Choose your way, in love
That only your heart knows about
 
Her under trærnes dunkle tak
Solens stråler leker med
Et enkelt liv, et liv i fred
 
Here under the dim roof of the trees
Do the sunbeams play with
A simple life, a peaceful life
 
Løft ditt hode, aksle din bør
Styrke det har du i deg
Og bygg din borg, vit hva du gjør
For tiden som kommer, blir farlig
Far varig frem
 
Lift your head, remove your burden
You will have strength
And build your castle, know what you're doing
'Cause the time comes will be dangerous
Move carefully
 
Mellomspill
 
Interlude
 
Helt uten ord er moders gråt
Helt uten ord et sinn i sorg
En drøm som brast, en fallen borg
 
A mother's tears are completely without words
A sorrowed mind, completely without words
A broken dream, a destroyed castle
 
 
Et sted finnes et håp som kaller
To liv, tilhørighet
Velg din vei, i kjærlighet
Som bare hjertet vet
 
Somewhere there is a hope that calls
Two lives, belonging
Choose your way, in love
That the heart only knows about
 
 

I've only listened to the first because I had to download it to hear it. I disagree with your second comment: I think your voice has a pretty sound. And if everything in singing is subjective, the sound of a voice is even much more! I truly do like yours.
 
I am also in a choir, in the lowest voice for female, and trying to be able to sing because the notes in the score are too high for me.

Teachers that tell their students that they don't sing well, or "can't do it" are uninformed cowards that hide their own inability to meet their student's needs, by taking advantage of their authority so their students will buy off on their bullshit.
It is a way of not accepting accountability for what you don't know about the voice and how to train it, and pointing the finger back at your student, with a lie... it is shameful.
If any voice "teacher" ever tells you that you can't do it, or you will never be able to sing high notes because your a baritone, or you are just not cut out for this or for that... tell them to FO and ask for your money back.

I've only listened to the first because I had to download it to hear it. I disagree with your second comment: I think your voice has a pretty sound. And if everything in singing is subjective, the sound of a voice is even much more! I truly do like yours.
 
I am also in a choir, in the lowest voice for female, and trying to be able to sing because the notes in the score are too high for me.

I've only listened to the first because I had to download it to hear it. I disagree with your second comment: I think your voice has a pretty sound. And if everything in singing is subjective, the sound of a voice is even much more! I truly do like yours.
 
I am also in a choir, in the lowest voice for female, and trying to be able to sing because the notes in the score are too high for me.

Hi Elise.... I love your videos... your adorable...
Always decent if not really good.... you have a future as a singer... keep going!!
1). I like that you are now experimenting with vocal processing... YES, use some reverb, however, this is a little too much. Turn it down a little bit, but just a bit. Never sing with a "flat" signal and no special sauce... Also, if you can, get some compression on your voice. You can get compression on a TC-Helicon pedal like the new Performance-V (see my review of this cool singer effects system in the vocal gear > processing forum), or one of their pedals. Some PA boards/heads have compression as well.
2). You might try improving your intonation by paying attention to not onsetting low and then scooping up. Singers do this ALL THE TIME... so be aware of it!  No "poop scoops" into the notes or out of the notes... straight in and straight out as much as possible. There are some blue note exceptions to that, but generally speaking, 90% of the time, no scooping!!!
I really don't have a lot of critiques on this performance Elise because it was pretty solid. For me, it almost comes down to production at this point on this song. How to get a better audio, a better video, etc. for your presentation. If you were my student, we would be working learning how to make recordings now... not live recordings like this.. which are fine, but you really need to begin making real recordings... singing into a microphone, into a DAW (digital audio workstation)... or software for recording, learning how to get levels, learning about compression and effects and then... learning how to take your audio and synch it to video so it looks real. Especially if you are presenting on YouTube.
Below is a new song I recently completed... Im not posting this to steal your thunder, but to show you the level of production I think you need to begin striving for. It will make you look more pro.
SECRET... This video looks like Im singing it live right there... it is an illusion. Now to be sure, I am NOT lip synching... I am actually singing the song and it did actually sound about 90% the save as the audio you are hearing, but the audio you are hearing was done before the video. Audio is produced first... made to sound as amazing as you can... then synced to video for the final presentation. The Audio is actually the hard part. Getting a good performance and mixing, etc... the video is the easy part. You just look pretty and 'act' in front of a camera.
This is how the pros do it... very rarely are you going to get this quality of recording, live... and that is the point... if you up your game in the quality of your audio... which you need to do at this point... you may as well synch it to a nice video since you are 90% there.
I can teach you how to do this btw... I can give you audio and video production lessons.
So I really think that is great advise... you need to learn how ... and get experience recording and start capturing all these songs your doing, at a higher level of production. Your ability to sing, has out grow the quality of your productions.
 
Ha! You thought I was just a rocker didn't ya... 
If you can take your singing... and turn them into productions like this... you will have the complete package and really start sounding and looking professional. And I think you are probably ready for it. The art of recording Elise, is 40% of the art of singing. It is part of the overall art form... you really need to learn how.
A great place to start is if on garageband... if you have a mac book or iPad, you get garageband automatically and it is a great way to cut your teeth on recording and you can make a good recording with garageband... don't let anyone tell you otherwise. When you are ready to get more powerful DAW, you should move up to Macs LogicProX... that is what I use... it is the pro version of garageband... or something like Reaper for PCs... Ron actually knows a lot about Reaper.

Thanks a lot guys for your very constructive comments appreciated as always  

very nice.  I had to fight to find anything to critique.
One tiny thing you might try. Work on "building" the song a bit more. The song is in 'AABA' form. Something like verse-verse-bridge-verse. So you can sit back and look at that and try to figure out what you want to do ahead of time to keep the song moving forward to the end.
The bridge, just by the nature of it going to different chords and different melodies will sort of take care of itself since it already provides a nice change from the 2 verses that preceded it.
So that leaves the verses to play with. As it stands you sort of did the 2nd verse as a carbon copy of the 1st verse. So in a way it DIDNT build....it just sort of cruised along...same pace, same volume, same phrasing.
Try to find a few small ways to intensify that 2nd verse. Maybe a slight volume increase. Maybe pick a few words and add a little more expression on them. Maybe the words "I", "be" "sin" "cant" (or "help"). You dont have to go crazy but maybe add some extra melisma or slight inflections or whatever
Like I said, on the bridge you dont have to go too nuts because its already serving its function to provide variety.
The on the 3rd verse youd reach the peak of intensity...more volume, more expression, maybe find a few ways to intensify the phrasing a bit.
Then use that very last repeat on the last verse to bring it all back down.
 
Sounds like a lot but its not really. Here is the scheme:
1st verse. Nice calm intro. Nice and relaxed, smooth phrasing
2nd verse. Build it up a bit to a slight peak
Bridge. The bridge takes people to a different place. The intensity can actually back off a bit to set people up for hitting them hard on that last verse.
3rd verse. The payoff. The peak. Hit 'em hard and then at the end bring 'em back down gently
 
And im not talking about wild intensity swings here, since the song is a pretty calm song in the first place....more like a small but definite up and down build of emotion etc
 
So really I cant critique the singing itself, but you can plan ahead a bit to form a strategy to draw the people in and move them a bit more WITH the singing skills.
--------------
The only itsy bitsy nitpicking singing thing I noticed was on the first verse, maybe you could have held the words "say" and "'in" a bit longer. And then on both verses, the last word "you" could be held a bit longer or softy faded out a bit longer. Sort of going by the Elvis version he held those 2 "you"s almost until the next word started (of course you have to get a breath in). On your version there is that slight gap after each 'you'
 
 
Other than that, great job! WAY better than I could do lol

Javastorm, I am you fan.
Your cover of Brian McKnight's song was the first time I heard it and I was like WOW  I am going there now to listen to it again.

https://app.box.com/s/fn9b0z7rl7v27mrb3g5gvcg8vntkt1f8
This song isn't very range-y, so I was trying to emphasize on performance and dynamics. Any and all feedback welcome.

All in all, this is a pretty solid attempt. In my opinion, few things could've been done better. Nice riffs throughout. I could feel the emotion.
Here's what I found noteworthy.
1:09 The shift into falsetto in the phrase "All my feeling was gone". I think you can make this smoother. Matter of fact, I know you can.
1:50 Very nice melisma!
2:24 Sing "gone" stronger. Sounds like you may have been having a little support dilemma there.
3:10 to 3:19 Your falsetto was getting quiet again, like we talked about before. Just noting it here, in case you didn't catch it.
3:44 The break here, while singing, "Dry my eyes," was a nice touch for the tone of the song. You're good at the use of little accents like that. Kind of like how I complimented you on the hint of rasp you used in your Christina Aguilera cover, a few weeks back. Keep this in mind, going forward.
3:47-3:48 The shift into falsetto here, at, "I had my," sounds just a little flat.
4:20 Nice transition into falsetto and nice ending. Was a little quiet here as well, but it's not as problematic. The difference between it there, and where I mentioned it at the 3:10 to 3:19 area is you don't want that happening in the middle of those smooth runs. People will miss them.
 

Did the original version recently. Any and all feedback welcome.
https://app.box.com/s/z4pem1kzthgsv7y2iandr7oliyqt5qnw
 

I'm pretty late [last day of challenge lol] but I did Kiss From a Rose by Seal. Couldn't find a backing track that didn't have backup vox so I did it a cappella.
https://app.box.com/s/24nttrom5mqewn4k0ab747k0x1pmytxg
 
Re: Gsoul - I never heard this song before but you definitely emoted well, and got the theme of unconditional love across really well in my opinion. I like the phrasing and riffs after the 2:00 mark- they sounded the most controlled and like ron said, something from the 70s, slow and sensual.
Re; Slow Start - I wish I had the ability to play and sing at the same time, if that's what you're doing! "How Long Will I Love You" sat in a nice part of your range and definitely fit the lover's theme both lyrically and in your smooth delivery. Really nice. My sentiments are the same about the second song also.
 

Thanks, Rosa! I am definitely playing the guitar part myself. I wish the songs were my own! The first one is a cover of The Waterboys (re-released by Ellie Goulding in the last few years) and the second is a cover of an unreleased Keaton Henson song. I tend to pick songs that resonate with me

Uh oh I'm a little late but I've got a couple I recorded recently. Sharing just for the sake of sharing the music.
I like your timbre, GSoul82! So rich! haha Some good melisma too.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

I was going to do Ribbon in the Sky by Stevie Wonder, but the instrumental was the original key, so it was too high. I also realized, while I can sing my higher notes without much trouble, they happen more prone to pitch error.
This is probably Musiq's hardest song for me. Not quite sure why. Might be the emotion he puts into it. The original: 
 
 
 
 
Yup. I can't ask other people to challenge themselves if I don't do it too
I wasn't really nervous there. I just heard wrong, so the pitch was off. I'll agree that I think it got better as I went on. Musiq's songs can be tricky, especially if you try to do them the way he does them, because he's almost constantly singing, and when there are no lyrics, he's usually filling in the space with improvisations. Posted the original song above your quote.

Here's my challenge to myself. I took a shot at Don't Change by Musiq Soulchild.
 
 
 

Something I threw together in the wee hours of the night.  I did a double track vocal to try and get the sound right and I think besides a few occasional out of syncs it works nicely.  Hopefully you guys like it.
http://picosong.com/E2RM/

About a week ago, I said we'd be having several challenges running at the same time. Several people had hinted in the past that they wanted this one. Leaving this here to be filled in a little later (probably tonight).