KillerKu

This is a cool song that was in my plans to do a decent study for a while, very interesting, full of details and "traps". For example, at first my idea was on the lines of "I will just support and darken the living hell out of it", but it sounded just wrong, after experimenting a long time, I found that it sounds much better to just relax and just speak it more, working with lower intensity (kinda the same that happens with everything else haha, but, tricked me anyways).
https://app.box.com/s/fw4z4p9bxailqaq8mjrqz4lmuz2h74m6
Hope you like it! Let me know please, everyone that listens and that can drop a few lines, thanks a lot!!!

Don't neglect top down training, imo. Swell a light non breathy sounding falsetto into a bigger voice without straining. If you keep going with the right vowels, closure, twang, and support you can build a stronger head voice. I can kind of take that and inch it into a shout. If you just shout you'll always be using thick folds, firm closure, and trying to thin from there without awareness of the other states of closure was too hard, for me at least. I had to approach voice from both sides and gradually increase and decrease the intensity.
Now that I have more than one coordination, I can kind of inch a shout down, but back in the day when I tried to sing lighter/middle/mixed/whatever, I just strangled myself, having no idea what the hell that was. 
Also, try different vowels. the vowels I intuitively sang with no knowledge of singing voice were 'ah' and 'oh' with a somewhat low larynx. Keeping a very open space. Those can be shouty vowels in the high range. Experiment with narrower vowels like 'a' in apple  'i in sit or 'e' in edible. R vowels might help too. Like arrrr and errr.   

3 things that you could work toward in order to improve this sample.
1 - Same vowel through it all, no nasalance. You begin with a nasal Ah, then you add a H behind the next note, then you change it to OH. Its either AH or Oh, and dont make it nasal, oral all the way, literally keep your voice in your mouth.
2 - Before you breath, think of the highest note on the interval you are going to sing, position your mouth, tongue, everything as if you were singing that note, then inhale WITH that positon and thinking of the vowel , dont let anything change, inhale with the "high note/vowel position" and keep it until the last note is finished.
3 - Dont thin, I have no idea of what you are trying to achieve by "thinning", but in fact, given what I heard in these samples, you would benefit from going strong. You have a bit of airyness, insecure attacks, etc. So instead of "thining out", I would think "loud and clear". Think authoritative voice, or calling someone thats far, whatever you need to keep you strong. The key here is to think of volume, of "more voice", and not of forcing/pushing it.

Don't neglect top down training, imo. Swell a light non breathy sounding falsetto into a bigger voice without straining. If you keep going with the right vowels, closure, twang, and support you can build a stronger head voice. I can kind of take that and inch it into a shout. If you just shout you'll always be using thick folds, firm closure, and trying to thin from there without awareness of the other states of closure was too hard, for me at least. I had to approach voice from both sides and gradually increase and decrease the intensity.
Now that I have more than one coordination, I can kind of inch a shout down, but back in the day when I tried to sing lighter/middle/mixed/whatever, I just strangled myself, having no idea what the hell that was. 
Also, try different vowels. the vowels I intuitively sang with no knowledge of singing voice were 'ah' and 'oh' with a somewhat low larynx. Keeping a very open space. Those can be shouty vowels in the high range. Experiment with narrower vowels like 'a' in apple  'i in sit or 'e' in edible. R vowels might help too. Like arrrr and errr.   

I'm always struck by how strange it is to hear your voice and kind of dig it. It reminds me of like the rawest, crazy John Lydon/David Bowie kind of thing. It sounds rock and roll. Seriously. It's very quiet, but from what I can hear the pitch isn't even that bad. If you were tone deaf, the pitch would go up and down in all the wrong directions. Most of us just don't have 'uber fine' pitch control in our voices to square in within 4 percent of the note.
So yeah, you sound kind of hardcore rock and roll to me, but then I read posts and most everything you say is about how you have nothing to go for, how you aren't born with it, and how discouraged and terrible you are. If anything will hold you back, it won't be your voice, it will be the attitude from which you end up approaching it.
I come from a family where everyone has mental illness so finding positives and training for positive goals, hasn't always been easy. I'm not judging you, it can be really hard . But seriously, it is going to be as simple as training for positive goals. What do you want to achieve. Train, work hard, use the knowledge of the teachers here to assist you. If you adopt a negative attitude about yourself, it will increase the likelihood you'll give up and go nowhere man. I know it might be talking to a brick wall, if this is subconscious and maybe you can't help it. But I'm serious, that it is easier to achieve a positive goal through practice and hard work, than tell yourself you are so terrible your goal is impossible.
We're all singers here. We all started somewhere, we all ended up somewhere different through some kind of training. So if you can, let it go, be rock and roll through this. I believe in your voice. It'd be really helpful if you could believe in it too.

I remember your version, Magika. It's great, I showed a family member who grew up in church and she loved it too. She said she'd heard it so many times but it never sounded so good. She grew up in a white church where they sang it 'square' so yours being influenced by jazz, soul, and black gospel really stepped it up for her.  
I'm not religious, but I have a few friends who grew up in religious environments and were non believers. Many experienced turmoil and conflict, so I did a quick acapella version from the perspective of a non believer trying to convince themselves:
https://app.box.com/s/hpywfqy7vw8sppimiiuwhxybd9tyanxr
I'll leave it up to others to make the 'traditionally good' non sacrilegious kind.

Hi, it's been a long time since I last logged in here but having gigs every second day all through the summertime was really tiring! But now here I am to take part to this "challenge"....hope you'll like my rendition of this wonderful gospel song! Let me know...bye!

 
 

I'm always struck by how strange it is to hear your voice and kind of dig it. It reminds me of like the rawest, crazy John Lydon/David Bowie kind of thing. It sounds rock and roll. Seriously. It's very quiet, but from what I can hear the pitch isn't even that bad. If you were tone deaf, the pitch would go up and down in all the wrong directions. Most of us just don't have 'uber fine' pitch control in our voices to square in within 4 percent of the note.
So yeah, you sound kind of hardcore rock and roll to me, but then I read posts and most everything you say is about how you have nothing to go for, how you aren't born with it, and how discouraged and terrible you are. If anything will hold you back, it won't be your voice, it will be the attitude from which you end up approaching it.
I come from a family where everyone has mental illness so finding positives and training for positive goals, hasn't always been easy. I'm not judging you, it can be really hard . But seriously, it is going to be as simple as training for positive goals. What do you want to achieve. Train, work hard, use the knowledge of the teachers here to assist you. If you adopt a negative attitude about yourself, it will increase the likelihood you'll give up and go nowhere man. I know it might be talking to a brick wall, if this is subconscious and maybe you can't help it. But I'm serious, that it is easier to achieve a positive goal through practice and hard work, than tell yourself you are so terrible your goal is impossible.
We're all singers here. We all started somewhere, we all ended up somewhere different through some kind of training. So if you can, let it go, be rock and roll through this. I believe in your voice. It'd be really helpful if you could believe in it too.

btw you are not tone deaf...otherwise your appreciation for music wouldnt exist...for the rest just practice bro...you came and went away on this forum like 5 times...just stick here, read, learn and practice...your vocal isnt even bad

I'm digging it. It's a hard song and you're doing well, but you asked for tonal advice and I think I have this figured out now. I think your soft palate is a key component in your tonal control.
It sounds like on the belting parts you raise it high enough that it is possibly creating more effort than might be needed and on the lower sections you lower it down to the point where some people are critiquing the nasality. 
I think finer tuned control might satisfy the cartoon critics (by raising it just slightly) and make the high end notes slightly less effortful (lowering just a bit).
If you look at this picture, you will notice the soft palate is in the area in the upper back part of your mouth, if you were to slide your tongue backwards, you'll feel a gap. Behind that and above is your soft palate.
http://headandneckcancerguide.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/40_1_softpalateCROP.jpg
You can learn to control the amount of elevation of this. I did examples with it down too low for my tastes, up too high for my tastes, and in a more neutral position I might use on sections of this song:
https://app.box.com/s/c5b8x5tmw8zwq2jwxjsn3i24i08wmbg1
Overall you're doing great, but I think if you get control over this any cartoon critics will be critiquing an artistic choice once you get full control over your soft palate. When you're in control of the amount of the amount, they can deal with whatever you choose. So try to practice the two different types of 'ah' I put in there. The kind of quacky, nasal one, and the super tall one. Feel the difference between the positions and try to find a neutral position that works.

Robert thank you again for your comments, I get what you say about needing to find that confidence.
KillerKu thank you for the great feedback and specific advice. I am beginning to see that the voice really is an instrument which needs to be learned and practices with no simple short cuts. I am trying the tip you suggested but I have a bit of a sore throat at the moment so will wait to recover from that and use that time to look into my options.
Thanks again!

I'm digging it. It's a hard song and you're doing well, but you asked for tonal advice and I think I have this figured out now. I think your soft palate is a key component in your tonal control.
It sounds like on the belting parts you raise it high enough that it is possibly creating more effort than might be needed and on the lower sections you lower it down to the point where some people are critiquing the nasality. 
I think finer tuned control might satisfy the cartoon critics (by raising it just slightly) and make the high end notes slightly less effortful (lowering just a bit).
If you look at this picture, you will notice the soft palate is in the area in the upper back part of your mouth, if you were to slide your tongue backwards, you'll feel a gap. Behind that and above is your soft palate.
http://headandneckcancerguide.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/40_1_softpalateCROP.jpg
You can learn to control the amount of elevation of this. I did examples with it down too low for my tastes, up too high for my tastes, and in a more neutral position I might use on sections of this song:
https://app.box.com/s/c5b8x5tmw8zwq2jwxjsn3i24i08wmbg1
Overall you're doing great, but I think if you get control over this any cartoon critics will be critiquing an artistic choice once you get full control over your soft palate. When you're in control of the amount of the amount, they can deal with whatever you choose. So try to practice the two different types of 'ah' I put in there. The kind of quacky, nasal one, and the super tall one. Feel the difference between the positions and try to find a neutral position that works.

I love it. I want a two part harmony pretty bad though. You might want to say woman instead of girl though to keep the rhyme. You're old enough to let it slide. The pause was charming though.
The phrasing and timing could use a little work here and there. Maybe try tapping one hand on the down beat (1 2 3 4), while tapping out the syllables with the other hand and/or your voice. You've got a beautiful voice, you sing with great feeling, and have a great presence. I'm a big fan of push and pull, feel, soul in rhythmic phrasing but but I think it might be sliding just a bit too far. Try subdividing the beat and count out with your  voice, tap it out with your hands, vice versa: 
1 EE and a 2 EE And A 3 EE and A 4 EE and A
And try to figure out where the lyrical stabs are falling. Then push and pull from there. You've got the beginnings of a nice flavor or personality. It's alive and not at all stiff. I feel like a lot of the things you're doing are great, but if they were pulled together a bit tighter it could get the best of both worlds, the feel and the snap of the rhythm.
I'm a huge Beatles fan. They are the reason I started singing in the first place and been wanting to sing Beatles material lately and this is just awesome. Thanks for posting it. You could really be going somewhere. Keep training. Your voice already sounds beautiful, only real possible error there is a loss of support in a few places, where notes kind of drifted down, but I like the naturalness of it. Sounded human and relate-able to me. 
Could be going places. You're already a really good singer and you have time to go wherever you want to go. Your live singing is already better than a lot of live pop performances I've heard prior to auto tune and live processing in the 80s and you're not cosmetically challenged, keep developing your stage presence and maybe even evolve a persona. Sky's the limit, but lots of luck involved.  

I love it. I want a two part harmony pretty bad though. You might want to say woman instead of girl though to keep the rhyme. You're old enough to let it slide. The pause was charming though.
The phrasing and timing could use a little work here and there. Maybe try tapping one hand on the down beat (1 2 3 4), while tapping out the syllables with the other hand and/or your voice. You've got a beautiful voice, you sing with great feeling, and have a great presence. I'm a big fan of push and pull, feel, soul in rhythmic phrasing but but I think it might be sliding just a bit too far. Try subdividing the beat and count out with your  voice, tap it out with your hands, vice versa: 
1 EE and a 2 EE And A 3 EE and A 4 EE and A
And try to figure out where the lyrical stabs are falling. Then push and pull from there. You've got the beginnings of a nice flavor or personality. It's alive and not at all stiff. I feel like a lot of the things you're doing are great, but if they were pulled together a bit tighter it could get the best of both worlds, the feel and the snap of the rhythm.
I'm a huge Beatles fan. They are the reason I started singing in the first place and been wanting to sing Beatles material lately and this is just awesome. Thanks for posting it. You could really be going somewhere. Keep training. Your voice already sounds beautiful, only real possible error there is a loss of support in a few places, where notes kind of drifted down, but I like the naturalness of it. Sounded human and relate-able to me. 
Could be going places. You're already a really good singer and you have time to go wherever you want to go. Your live singing is already better than a lot of live pop performances I've heard prior to auto tune and live processing in the 80s and you're not cosmetically challenged, keep developing your stage presence and maybe even evolve a persona. Sky's the limit, but lots of luck involved.  

Hey Charlie,
 
Glad you like this video... But you need to focus on the basics right now. 
 
- Onsets.
- Learning how to "buzz" on nasal consonants to heal your voice and build some vocal health.
- Some basic scales to train.
- Keep singing songs as your voice grows stronger.
 
We can get to distortion later, first we have to train a foundation for you.

That sounds placed right to me but still a bit clumsy cause the coordination isn't fully dialed in to stability. I'm not the resident Dio guy. My version is kind of like a confused pirate that says something in between 'ahhr and ehhr.' But if you get the placement fairly right it shouldn't tap out, increase in compression when ascending too much, or hit a wall when bridging into headier placement. Mine sucks but doesn't tap out:
https://app.box.com/s/ztzkrd3pv4vedad3v665w8mp7jnceb9v
 I'm pretty sure what I'd need to do if I was going to really work on the Dio would be manage compression levels and do the Messa di voce thing (swell from lightest tone) into it the pirate cause right now mine is even clumsier than yours. I do practice swells every day now with regular voice in all parts from lowest to highest notes (thanks to Dan, who showed it to me and it really stuck), but I never really practice my DIo impression much.
But yeah, to me it sounds right, depending on what happens when you ascend.

I was in a phase where I could siren a lot of things I couldn't sing which I think is normal. My advice: make sure you focus on real real singing onsets: every vowel in the language (and more). The siren might help you get an idea of where the placement goes, but each vowel will have it's own characteristics. Your end goal will have to be singing without any helper tricks, right?
One other thing I noticed in the clip, is you would do a very small falsetto, and then a pretty full voice. It would be 0 or 100. Regardless of whether this particular song is too difficult for you to nail exactly, I don't think it's too early to work on other percentages. For me, that more than probably anything has prevented me from either slamming or or cracking. It's kind of like a gas pedal.
You might be able to drive by slamming 100 and 0 rapidly, it would  harder on your vehicle and increase likelihood of an accident, basically a similar concept can occur in voice. If I was really serious about singing Dio style stuff which as of this moment, it's I would definitely train going from the smaller voice  as steadily to whatever 100 percent voice you're interested in, and back again.
Cause that's what Dio did, imo:
 
He wasn't a gas pedal cranker, imo. He dialed in just the right amount of closure and compression that was not fatiguing and was free enough to control for his voice. Now lots of us have thrown down the pedal and just cranked. I have, you have. More have than not. But if you want to be able to sing like Dio, you should probably learn how to control the throttle here equally well.
In that sense, maybe Bob is right. Maybe it's too soon for all of us.

Certainly, pursue the song, but be realistic..This ones like carving a statue.  Chip away on it each day...and do other songs less demanding as well.

Here is what i am hearing, your voice is struggeling because there is to big diffrence between your open and closed sounds. More importantly the narrower vowels, and that entire line is just a pingpongmatch between open and closed vowels.
Buuuhht Laaahhiiiihhfs nAaat a Wheeeeel wiihth Chaaahhnge mAaaaiihhhd Ohhhf Steeeeeeeeel 
try this, a simple "trick" i personaly use When singers and songwriters tends to gimme the short stick and throw in to many consonants  

I've been thinking since we are kind of a male dominated forum something typically known to be sung by a female would be a good twist, but at the same time participation is important.
For gospel, the most familiar song to me is definitely Amazing Grace. I'm agnostic, and that song can really move me. If I were to delve into soul songs that cover gospel topics I could list a lot, but since we went soul last month with Al Green. Soul is in some ways a secularized gospel with a lot of influence coming that direction.   
For pop, I've been more than a bit stumped. I have some good ideas, but a lot are very soul influenced pop. Trying to think of something that isn't Britney and very unappealing to my ears, and also isn't soul. I'd definitely sing this one:

Well, I'm super late to this challenge, but I finally took the time to get to it. I'm still halfway between two houses, due to a protracted moving situation, luckily I have my microphone and an an electric guitar.
Al Green is one of my favorite singers of all time and has been a huge influence already on my singing. I always wanted to try my best at this song.

There is a dissonance that sounds kind of arty to me in the vocals. It isn't just on the section you mentioned, but earlier on where there is a double vocal they  kind of sit together tensely, but almost consistently so. I wasn't sure if it was intentional. I've heard some artists go for a bit more aggression, darkness, and despair by having vocals more tensely pitched, and it works to my ears, but without the lyrics or intent of the song it's difficult for me to get my ear around it for sure.
If you were to do what Rob said and grab a keyboard and stay on every note, it would resolve the tension and have more of a mainstream sound. It's too tense for radio, but in the right circumstances I can identity with it cause for me a lot of times that's just how life feels as a human being trying to fit into a structured or even mechanically tuned environment. 
Aside from that your voice sounds placed well, has a good timbre, and sounds pretty much in control and in command. I think you fit well into this band and are a good fit for the band's prog style.  You didn't want compositional impressions, but I did think the composition had quite a bit of energy.
As radio music, it's not designed to give listeners enough 'release.' But as a young band making art music. I think it is cool. Sometimes I wish a track like yours would be released on the radio. To challenge listeners and have the ability to reach alienated ears, but it's not to be, and certainly not right now where everything is pitch corrected all the time so a fair portion of tension that used to exist just doesn't exist in music and it's all release, sugary and so forth and fails to express a fair portion of the human experience which isn't all roses and sometimes has conflict.

I had to pause singing for some weeks - but thanks to you guys in this forum, I am back and highly motivated. So even if the deadline was yesterday I really wanted to join this challenge. The song has been on my list for some time. Now this is my first attempt - after practicing it for 2 days.  
I think that "feel so brand-new" and "my life with you" needs a lot more work...
 
https://app.box.com/s/4htip1v64tc8dpsmbfauzbm39s6bx8p2

There is a dissonance that sounds kind of arty to me in the vocals. It isn't just on the section you mentioned, but earlier on where there is a double vocal they  kind of sit together tensely, but almost consistently so. I wasn't sure if it was intentional. I've heard some artists go for a bit more aggression, darkness, and despair by having vocals more tensely pitched, and it works to my ears, but without the lyrics or intent of the song it's difficult for me to get my ear around it for sure.
If you were to do what Rob said and grab a keyboard and stay on every note, it would resolve the tension and have more of a mainstream sound. It's too tense for radio, but in the right circumstances I can identity with it cause for me a lot of times that's just how life feels as a human being trying to fit into a structured or even mechanically tuned environment. 
Aside from that your voice sounds placed well, has a good timbre, and sounds pretty much in control and in command. I think you fit well into this band and are a good fit for the band's prog style.  You didn't want compositional impressions, but I did think the composition had quite a bit of energy.
As radio music, it's not designed to give listeners enough 'release.' But as a young band making art music. I think it is cool. Sometimes I wish a track like yours would be released on the radio. To challenge listeners and have the ability to reach alienated ears, but it's not to be, and certainly not right now where everything is pitch corrected all the time so a fair portion of tension that used to exist just doesn't exist in music and it's all release, sugary and so forth and fails to express a fair portion of the human experience which isn't all roses and sometimes has conflict.